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Sunday Sissy Meditation

 

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Day 3344 in Sissy Chastity & The Joys of Staying Soft

 

I like the fact that today is just a random number in my permanent sissy chastity journey. Day 3344 does have a nice ring to it however. What's on my mind this morning is the joy a sissy experiences only after years of chastity training, when they revel in the permanent changes on one's body, and by that I mean that we begin to stay soft almost all the time. This includes when being turned on.

I know all of us can go back to our beginning panty boi days when merely fondling a pair of Woman's panties would induce the most raging hardon's of our lives, and that connection was intense. Many stay with that kink portion of our journey, where the clothes of a Woman equate a powerful kink. 

 But there is a magical world beyond just the kink, and one only finds that world when a Woman opens the door to it. That means we have to reveal our true selves to a Woman, either by choice or by accident, but only a Woman can allow you in

 But once you have been allowed in, an entire world of choices becomes yours should you wish to pursue them. You can stay a playing panty boi, dabbling in using Feminization to serve your still male ego dominated kinks, because that is the easy route, and many choose easy.

But the world of allowing Femininity to envelop you, shape you, change you, and make you a better person mind, body, and spirit, that is a world beyond capable thought at the start.  But should you choose to take each step one by one, you will find yourself miles and miles away from where you began, and you will never miss the place you started.

 Finding Dominant Women to forcibly purge the evil and destructive male ego from your life is essential. Humiliation, documentation, and positive reinforcement of your new life are all critical steps needed to accept the sissy you secretly have known for many years, has always existed. I am a believer that real sissies are born, and if we are truly fortunate, the Feminine Universe reveals itself to us to discover our true selves fate intended us to be.

 I became much more fulfilled as a person when I accepted both my failures as a masquerading male's male, cast that aside and began embracing the sissy I knew I was since I was very young. I now proudly have a whole second bedroom filled with more Female clothes etc than in the "other" room, where I still have to masquerade in vanilla life. In fact I write my blog posts from my sissy bedroom, surrounded by the Feminine energy of all the clothes, panties, dresses etc many gifted to me by amazing Women. But changing the packaging on the outside is only a small part of the equation. Becoming the real sissy the Feminine Universe intended you to be, means changing spiritually and physically.

 Sissy chastity is that gateway, and it's been an amazing thing to witness the sheer explosion of sissies worldwide embracing chastity as a normal party of everyone's sissy life. I absolutely love it that chastity is a sissy's new normal, and 3344 days later, I can't imagine not being permanently denied physical pleasures of a life I have willingly left behind. But those new to chastity always fret over physical stimulations and the joys of self joy. But as many of us experienced sissies know, another whole new world of sexual pleasure awaits those brave enough to change how their sissy brains experience pleasure sexually. 

Any sissy who discovers their hidden sexual organ, the p-spot sissygasm, soon understands that sexual pleaure in any other way becomes a massive disappointment. A real sissygasm is the closest experience we will ever have in achieving a true Womanly physical and spiritual experience, and as sissies it becomes our duty to learn to only want to experience satisfaction in this manner. The days of being a painty boi, jerking off your rock hard erection into a pair of panties is long over.

 Being a sissy means chiselling away all the ugliness of your original male existence and smoothing out the rough edges and replacing them with softer curves, softer traits, more empathy, better manners, quieter voices, and making way at all times for the stronger Women in our lives, elevating Them, and Their desires.

Our experiences as sissies, buttressed by long term chastity, allows us the experiences of our sissy clits remaining restrained for long periods of time, and in turn becoming softer, smaller, and completely insignificant in our most basic sexual urges where our p-spot sissygasms replace the old ways. 

That is where the joys of being soft becomes a spiritual elevation of our Feminine selves. Being soft is the thing we all should experience, because it means our minds are right. We aren't being controlled by useless male thoughts behind the scenes. Our old male egos have been obliterated and crushed to dust. What we offer now is soft, pretty, and in full contrast to our old ways

 When once in our younger days, many dreamed of having size and girth in those ugly cotton briefs, we have now progressed to a place where we love and adore those above us who are beautiful, Feminine, advanced, and now make us dream of shrinking our panty encased sissy-clits to as small as possible. And the smaller our sissy-clits become the more beautiful expression of our developing Femininity our sissy leaks become

But perhaps the best thing about all the above is when you share those experiences with the Dominant Women in your life. Expressing your grattitude to Them, in allowing you to grow into the sissy you have always been meant to be, develops another under developed sissy trait: Gratitude.

Sissies should always express their genuine gratitude to the Women in their lives who have created the place for a sissy to become the real versions of themselves. Because as we know, without Women, we are nothing. 

 The more you give to others, the more you will receive from the Feminine Universe. I have lived this enough to know it is absolute truth.

Sincerely Sissy

Devina 

Vintage Sissy Art Vol 38

Accepting Your Sissy Self Changes Your Relationship with All Women

 One of the major changes I have experienced in my ongoing sissy life's journey is in how my daily relationship and perspective towards all Women has evolved to the point that my secret sissy self to Women in the vanilla world, expresses itself in quiet servitude. Increased manners, politeness, yielding way in lineups etc...it all has changed, and for the better I might add.

 When you accept yourself for what you always have known that you are, as a sissy, you begin to lose the weight of the internal battles your old emasculated male ego would wage against your thoughts, actions, and the sheer fatigue of those mental battles, begin to fall to the wayside and you can simply live a more peaceful and relaxed life, regardless if you live your sissy life in private, public, or both.

 One of the compliments that I cherish the most is from my Domme, Lady Diva Cane, when She compliments me on my consistency in my devotion, and efforts to express my eternal gratitude to wards Her and Others who have continued to reinforce my path as Her sissy.  When you let yourself practice the habits of a behaved sissy each day, and allow those feelings to come forth in the daily world, to be expressed by better behaviour towards all Women, it becomes a much easier thing to find your own consistency. And isn't that what being a sissy is truly all about?

 While all of us sissies start behind the same locked door of a bedroom, usually with a pair of panties, pantyhose, or stockings, it' becomes our life long mission to evolve, and to accept that we can never stop learning how to be better Feminine versions of ourselves. A large percentage stop themselves at the "sissy slut" stage, and while that is a very fun place to be, one should never stop there. I look back at that stage in my sissy life as the end of the beginning, for my spiritual sissy journey truly began when I knew I needed more from being a sissy than just the physical, and the humiliation rituals of the war with my old male ego.

 Loving yourself as a sissy means loving all Women, regardless of Their relationship with you. This is especially true to Women who are complete strangers to you. Your manners, and quiet submission to Their needs in daily life reflect positively on all the things your Domme teaches you, and all the Feminine lessons you learn as a sissy. These should reflect in your attitudes, mannerisms, and conducts each and ever day. Women will notice good behaviour, regardless if they know you are a sissy or not. Why, you ask? Simply because the world today is so devoid of what you can offer any Woman, quietly as a sissy.  Respect, manners, politeness, and putting a Woman's needs before yours in any situation is something Women DO notice. Your reward may be small in gesture, but in reality your daily reward as a sissy should be that each and every day, you did something to make the lives of any Women you interact with each day, a more pleasant experience. Most importantly without expecting anything in return.

 Your consistent quiet expression of your sissy self in daily life will also be noticed by the Dominant Woman in your life, and in those moments when She decides to reward your good sissy behaviour, it is in those moments where it is crucial to mentally link Her rewards with your efforts to all Women. This is an essential step in expanding your spiritual sense of your sissy self. Your good energy that you should put forth to all Women, eventually comes back to you by the Woman in your life who has put in such an effort into making you a far better person than where you started, behind that locked door.

Embrace your sissy self. Never stop trying to be the best sissy you can be. Do it for Her.

 

Devina 

Today on FDTV

 

Perhaps the Feminine Universe Enjoys Tormenting me

 

I have been very blessed as a sissy by my Domme, Lady Diva Cane and by my original Matriarch fairy Godmother Lady Morganna to have experienced some amazing things in my sissy life. Losing my anal virginity, my first makeover, hands free sissygasms, and much more to list. I consider them all blessings from the Feminine Universe of Femdomination as a devoted sissy to Female Supremacy.

There has been one experience that I have been knocking at the door for many summers now, but simply have been unable to unlock the key to, and that's experiencing a sissygasm while riding my bicycle, very much as a young Girl would. I have experienced many times while on a long ride, Femdom visualizations that caused me to experience massive edging, and have tried to bring myself to that magic place where my turgid sissy clit messes up my bike shorts, but again and again i am denied the trip over the sissygasm falls.

  Today I even tried stacking the deck, and rode for over an hour with my own sissy mindbreaker audio mix playing in my earbuds. I created several 7 hour audio tracks of a variety of sissy hypno mixes to sleep to, and I had one playing today while riding. I even began a series of visualizations of Lady Diva, and Lady M enjoying my asspussy being plowed by Shecock, and tried to embrace Their smiles of seeing Their sissy creation be thoroughly abused by Shecock. No matter what I tried, my exercise session was an enormous edging experience and nothing more.

I shared my frustrations with Lady Diva just a short while ago, and in Her wisdom, She offered a reason as to why the Feminine Universe seemingly enjoys tormenting me so much this way.

"It's Penance"

 Her reply made me immediately understand what I was experiencing, by not experiencing a sissygasm on my bike seat. And with that comment, I simply replied,

"Then i gladly accept"

I'm certain tomorrow will bring a huge sissyleak while fully limp from my little nub like sissy clit encased in panties, and I will express my gratitude to the Feminine Universe and Lady Diva for allowing me that.

And I will continue to pay my penance for my pre Devina life...

Joys of Sissy Summer

 

Play By The Rules

 

There Was Really No Other Choice

 

Early stages of Devina

I've been thinking back lately to pivotal moments in my sissy life, where I came to major crossroads and chose a path that left me no return. One I always look back fondly now is coming to the conclusion that I needed to pursue my submission from a sissy perspective, as continuing to be a panty boi male subbie was a a path of diminishing returns.

Since I've always thought of myself as a bit of a lone wolf type, it didn't make much sense to carry on in any male submissive role as beyond the foundational training Mistress Morganna had provided, simply to be one male subbie in a filthy sea of icky males. Being a sissy provided many things to my soul, but it also provided a much less crowded place to try and discover myself and to hopefully grow. I had no idea back then what I would even become, as I certainly never imagined it would be where I am today. But I knew I needed to find someplace else in the BDSM world and admitting to myself and to Mistress Morganna and then Lady Diva Cane that I didn't just want to be a sissy, I needed to be a sissy in order to discover myself.

 

In realizing my inner sissy and being able to have the opportunity for Devina to blossom and grow, my love for Women has only deepened as my sissy journey has continued. Even when I reached the point of acceptance that vanilla sex with Women was becoming of less and less value in my life, and admitting that my desires for Shecock was becoming more and more of value in my life, my sincere love of Women only grew as it moved away from sexual and more towards spiritual. My empathy began to increase, my desire to bond spiritually with Women in the special ways that Women do, became noticeable to me. I realized that I was much more a sissy lesbian than anything, even if I could no longer muster the energy to chase Women in any vanilla capacity. No, relationships with Women would now be unique, and from a place where I was always a bottom to Them, and that was something that I would discover was very fulfilling.

 

But it was sissy chastity in many ways that brought it all into focus. No longer consumed with thoughts of self pleasuring that thing between my legs, chastity brought things far more into focus of what my emotional needs and spiritual needs are. The eventual experience of my first hands free sissygasm only served to reinforce that my decision was right all along. There has been no experience that could compare as a male to the sensations felt experiencing my first true sissygasm, and the joy it brought me to know that I could finally cum like a Woman. It only brought me closer to the Women I'm able to share my sissylife with, which is so wonderful.

Dominant Women tend to have special places in Their world for Their sissy gurls, and the more you show them that you want to be in that place, the more you earn your way into that place, the more magical and wonderful it becomes to find yourself within it. For me there was no other logical choice. One could say being a sissy was my destiny...

 

Sincerely Sissy

Devina 

A Sissy Should Always be Health Conscious

 

3300 Days in Sissy Chastity!

 Today I happily celebrate 3300 days in sissy chastity. The life changing effect that long term chastity has had on me is incomparable to other aspects of my sissy life's journey. I used to obsess over 25 day milestones, but now it's such a part of my day to day life, that hundreds of days can go by and I don't feel the need anymore to mark the signposts.

I love my sissy life completely absent of the ugliness of an old male like of wanking and spilling gross male seed in the world. I DO love my sissy leaks, dribbles, and wetting of my panties when my sissy brain obsesses over Shecock.

Overlooked by many is the reduction of stress in one's life when their brain never has to devote energy to how to "get off". 

Life is better Locked!  

Sissy Life Archives - Taking More Steps Out of the Shadows

 Originally posted Aug 9, 2020

 

 One of the lovely things about social media profiles as a sissy is the ability to create new network of friends and like minded people to interact with and grow with. As a sissy it's also a way to quietly and slowly integrate one's vanilla life a bit more with their sissylife by trying to bring some people you know or have known before into one's sissy world in the hopes they are open minded to accept you then interact with you as the person you are on the inside as well.

My sissylife has always been very carefully managed for a number of reasons. Where I live, the joke is that there are 2 degrees of separation, and this is certainly true. It takes no time at all to connect with someone who knows someone and voila, everyone can know quite a lot in a hurry. So my vanilla life growing up and becoming who I was and what I did and do, before the fundamental change to accept and create a world where Devina could not only exist but have a life of her own, needed to be kept apart. This is not unusual for anyone who has struggled with gender/lifestyle issues whatsoever.

For me to come out and say to everyone, "Tada! Hey I'm a sissified TGirl lover" would ultimately create massive problems for many, and for me just isn't an option at this point in life. The discrete carefully managed approach is best and this I know. It still doesn't mean I don't crave having people from one world discover the other. When I can manage this, it becomes a joy.

 

Outside of my BDSM/kink world, I am so happy to have about a half dozen Women in my social media life who knowingly or unknowingly have known both sides of the complete me, and I keep trying to grow that number but it can be a scary thing. Sending a FB invite as Devina to someone you once dated can be terrifying, and many times has not born fruit but I keep hoping for more acceptance. To those select few that are in Devina's social circle, please know that while you may not realize it, I value your acceptance in ways that are hard to even share in words. I hope to add to those numbers as time goes on.

A journey into a world of Femininity is never easy as a gurl, but even now, I happily find myself at a place that was once unimaginable. One step at a time is always the way forward.

Sincerely Sissy 

Devina