Happy Birthday to....Me!

 Sept 27 is my chosen sissy birthday as it honours the date that I came out and fully admitted my true sissy self to the the person who would become my fairy Godmother, Lady Morganna. Lady M was the first to take the submissive lump of male clay and begin the process of forming it into the Shecock loving, chastised sissy I have been for many years now.  

It was under Her guidance that She taught me to suck cock, take cock, and abandon all hopes and illusions that I was anything other than Her submissive sissy.

 

Every day since then I try to live my sissy life in such a way as to honour Her efforts into changing my life so fundamentally. So on the day of my sissy birthday, I express my gratitude to everyone who has enriched my sissy life!

Day 3344 in Sissy Chastity & The Joys of Staying Soft

 

I like the fact that today is just a random number in my permanent sissy chastity journey. Day 3344 does have a nice ring to it however. What's on my mind this morning is the joy a sissy experiences only after years of chastity training, when they revel in the permanent changes on one's body, and by that I mean that we begin to stay soft almost all the time. This includes when being turned on.

I know all of us can go back to our beginning panty boi days when merely fondling a pair of Woman's panties would induce the most raging hardon's of our lives, and that connection was intense. Many stay with that kink portion of our journey, where the clothes of a Woman equate a powerful kink. 

 But there is a magical world beyond just the kink, and one only finds that world when a Woman opens the door to it. That means we have to reveal our true selves to a Woman, either by choice or by accident, but only a Woman can allow you in

 But once you have been allowed in, an entire world of choices becomes yours should you wish to pursue them. You can stay a playing panty boi, dabbling in using Feminization to serve your still male ego dominated kinks, because that is the easy route, and many choose easy.

But the world of allowing Femininity to envelop you, shape you, change you, and make you a better person mind, body, and spirit, that is a world beyond capable thought at the start.  But should you choose to take each step one by one, you will find yourself miles and miles away from where you began, and you will never miss the place you started.

 Finding Dominant Women to forcibly purge the evil and destructive male ego from your life is essential. Humiliation, documentation, and positive reinforcement of your new life are all critical steps needed to accept the sissy you secretly have known for many years, has always existed. I am a believer that real sissies are born, and if we are truly fortunate, the Feminine Universe reveals itself to us to discover our true selves fate intended us to be.

 I became much more fulfilled as a person when I accepted both my failures as a masquerading male's male, cast that aside and began embracing the sissy I knew I was since I was very young. I now proudly have a whole second bedroom filled with more Female clothes etc than in the "other" room, where I still have to masquerade in vanilla life. In fact I write my blog posts from my sissy bedroom, surrounded by the Feminine energy of all the clothes, panties, dresses etc many gifted to me by amazing Women. But changing the packaging on the outside is only a small part of the equation. Becoming the real sissy the Feminine Universe intended you to be, means changing spiritually and physically.

 Sissy chastity is that gateway, and it's been an amazing thing to witness the sheer explosion of sissies worldwide embracing chastity as a normal party of everyone's sissy life. I absolutely love it that chastity is a sissy's new normal, and 3344 days later, I can't imagine not being permanently denied physical pleasures of a life I have willingly left behind. But those new to chastity always fret over physical stimulations and the joys of self joy. But as many of us experienced sissies know, another whole new world of sexual pleasure awaits those brave enough to change how their sissy brains experience pleasure sexually. 

Any sissy who discovers their hidden sexual organ, the p-spot sissygasm, soon understands that sexual pleaure in any other way becomes a massive disappointment. A real sissygasm is the closest experience we will ever have in achieving a true Womanly physical and spiritual experience, and as sissies it becomes our duty to learn to only want to experience satisfaction in this manner. The days of being a painty boi, jerking off your rock hard erection into a pair of panties is long over.

 Being a sissy means chiselling away all the ugliness of your original male existence and smoothing out the rough edges and replacing them with softer curves, softer traits, more empathy, better manners, quieter voices, and making way at all times for the stronger Women in our lives, elevating Them, and Their desires.

Our experiences as sissies, buttressed by long term chastity, allows us the experiences of our sissy clits remaining restrained for long periods of time, and in turn becoming softer, smaller, and completely insignificant in our most basic sexual urges where our p-spot sissygasms replace the old ways. 

That is where the joys of being soft becomes a spiritual elevation of our Feminine selves. Being soft is the thing we all should experience, because it means our minds are right. We aren't being controlled by useless male thoughts behind the scenes. Our old male egos have been obliterated and crushed to dust. What we offer now is soft, pretty, and in full contrast to our old ways

 When once in our younger days, many dreamed of having size and girth in those ugly cotton briefs, we have now progressed to a place where we love and adore those above us who are beautiful, Feminine, advanced, and now make us dream of shrinking our panty encased sissy-clits to as small as possible. And the smaller our sissy-clits become the more beautiful expression of our developing Femininity our sissy leaks become

But perhaps the best thing about all the above is when you share those experiences with the Dominant Women in your life. Expressing your grattitude to Them, in allowing you to grow into the sissy you have always been meant to be, develops another under developed sissy trait: Gratitude.

Sissies should always express their genuine gratitude to the Women in their lives who have created the place for a sissy to become the real versions of themselves. Because as we know, without Women, we are nothing. 

 The more you give to others, the more you will receive from the Feminine Universe. I have lived this enough to know it is absolute truth.

Sincerely Sissy

Devina 

Accepting Your Sissy Self Changes Your Relationship with All Women

 One of the major changes I have experienced in my ongoing sissy life's journey is in how my daily relationship and perspective towards all Women has evolved to the point that my secret sissy self to Women in the vanilla world, expresses itself in quiet servitude. Increased manners, politeness, yielding way in lineups etc...it all has changed, and for the better I might add.

 When you accept yourself for what you always have known that you are, as a sissy, you begin to lose the weight of the internal battles your old emasculated male ego would wage against your thoughts, actions, and the sheer fatigue of those mental battles, begin to fall to the wayside and you can simply live a more peaceful and relaxed life, regardless if you live your sissy life in private, public, or both.

 One of the compliments that I cherish the most is from my Domme, Lady Diva Cane, when She compliments me on my consistency in my devotion, and efforts to express my eternal gratitude to wards Her and Others who have continued to reinforce my path as Her sissy.  When you let yourself practice the habits of a behaved sissy each day, and allow those feelings to come forth in the daily world, to be expressed by better behaviour towards all Women, it becomes a much easier thing to find your own consistency. And isn't that what being a sissy is truly all about?

 While all of us sissies start behind the same locked door of a bedroom, usually with a pair of panties, pantyhose, or stockings, it' becomes our life long mission to evolve, and to accept that we can never stop learning how to be better Feminine versions of ourselves. A large percentage stop themselves at the "sissy slut" stage, and while that is a very fun place to be, one should never stop there. I look back at that stage in my sissy life as the end of the beginning, for my spiritual sissy journey truly began when I knew I needed more from being a sissy than just the physical, and the humiliation rituals of the war with my old male ego.

 Loving yourself as a sissy means loving all Women, regardless of Their relationship with you. This is especially true to Women who are complete strangers to you. Your manners, and quiet submission to Their needs in daily life reflect positively on all the things your Domme teaches you, and all the Feminine lessons you learn as a sissy. These should reflect in your attitudes, mannerisms, and conducts each and ever day. Women will notice good behaviour, regardless if they know you are a sissy or not. Why, you ask? Simply because the world today is so devoid of what you can offer any Woman, quietly as a sissy.  Respect, manners, politeness, and putting a Woman's needs before yours in any situation is something Women DO notice. Your reward may be small in gesture, but in reality your daily reward as a sissy should be that each and every day, you did something to make the lives of any Women you interact with each day, a more pleasant experience. Most importantly without expecting anything in return.

 Your consistent quiet expression of your sissy self in daily life will also be noticed by the Dominant Woman in your life, and in those moments when She decides to reward your good sissy behaviour, it is in those moments where it is crucial to mentally link Her rewards with your efforts to all Women. This is an essential step in expanding your spiritual sense of your sissy self. Your good energy that you should put forth to all Women, eventually comes back to you by the Woman in your life who has put in such an effort into making you a far better person than where you started, behind that locked door.

Embrace your sissy self. Never stop trying to be the best sissy you can be. Do it for Her.

 

Devina 

Sissy Life Archives - Taking More Steps Out of the Shadows

 Originally posted Aug 9, 2020

 

 One of the lovely things about social media profiles as a sissy is the ability to create new network of friends and like minded people to interact with and grow with. As a sissy it's also a way to quietly and slowly integrate one's vanilla life a bit more with their sissylife by trying to bring some people you know or have known before into one's sissy world in the hopes they are open minded to accept you then interact with you as the person you are on the inside as well.

My sissylife has always been very carefully managed for a number of reasons. Where I live, the joke is that there are 2 degrees of separation, and this is certainly true. It takes no time at all to connect with someone who knows someone and voila, everyone can know quite a lot in a hurry. So my vanilla life growing up and becoming who I was and what I did and do, before the fundamental change to accept and create a world where Devina could not only exist but have a life of her own, needed to be kept apart. This is not unusual for anyone who has struggled with gender/lifestyle issues whatsoever.

For me to come out and say to everyone, "Tada! Hey I'm a sissified TGirl lover" would ultimately create massive problems for many, and for me just isn't an option at this point in life. The discrete carefully managed approach is best and this I know. It still doesn't mean I don't crave having people from one world discover the other. When I can manage this, it becomes a joy.

 

Outside of my BDSM/kink world, I am so happy to have about a half dozen Women in my social media life who knowingly or unknowingly have known both sides of the complete me, and I keep trying to grow that number but it can be a scary thing. Sending a FB invite as Devina to someone you once dated can be terrifying, and many times has not born fruit but I keep hoping for more acceptance. To those select few that are in Devina's social circle, please know that while you may not realize it, I value your acceptance in ways that are hard to even share in words. I hope to add to those numbers as time goes on.

A journey into a world of Femininity is never easy as a gurl, but even now, I happily find myself at a place that was once unimaginable. One step at a time is always the way forward.

Sincerely Sissy 

Devina

One Million - The Road Back

 

If you don't know, this is the second version of my blog after gewgel suddenly , without warning, and without explanation (even when challenged) nuked my blog after 11 1/2 years. That first blog had over 9.7 million views and I was crushed. I came very close to throwing in the towel.

But it was my need to have my sissy story "forevered" in the internet, so that there was no denying who I always was. So, I started all over again, except this time I had the weight of my own name being shadowbanned by gewgel on all levels.

The growth of this blog was slow, painfully slow. You couldn't search my name for months and find any traces to me of this new blog. But I soldiered on, day after day, re-establishing my foot hold. The first months were depressing with 3-5k views per month, then for months it felt like my traffic was throttled at 10k, then 15k. For over a year I couldn't get over 15k views no matter what I tried. 

It took over 2 years to hit 500 000 views. I kept going on.

The this Feb something happened, other search engine traffic came alive and the numbers started growing, slowly then suddenly. Now only 9 months after taking more than 2 years to hit 500 000 views, I've gone over 1 000 000 as of this morning. Between this blog and my old one, I've gone over 10 million.

Thank you to everyone who has helped me rebuild this place where the sissy life, my story, and my love of Women and Trans Women can be celebrated. 

Erotic Art and the Intrusion of AI

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