Rule 18: Going Back to the Begining

 When gewgel gave my 11 yr old blog the death sentence, as I shared upon restarting, they refused repeated requests for clarity or specifics, instead choosing to hide behind an inaccurate, vague, blanket, completely nonsense reason of child exploitation. It still makes my blood boil to type that. What's worse, is I have no idea what one should or shouldn't import from any backups I have that cover my real story.

The whole purpose of my original blog was to help deal with cascading emotional trauma I was dealing with and a way to unburden my feelings and emotions by self examining myself and how I became what I did from the very earliest memories I had. I also wanted to leave a record of who and what I was. I was tired of staying fully hidden in my closet, and this was my way of telling my story with no going back.

So after many weeks of thinking of how I could do that again without running afoul of nonsensical reasons and rules gewgel hides behind, I needed to come up with a new way of expressing my story and creatively not linking certain stages in my life that would draw unwanted attention and consequence. 

Hence, Rule 18.

From here forward, whenever I share aspects of my earliest formation of my sissy life, I will invoke in the post title " Rule 18". This will require you, the reader, to do some simple math by subtracting (18) from any mentioned numbers, and I will have to take care in not alluding to descriptions that could be misinterpreted. I still want my story to be re-told, but I have to exercise more care in doing so, as it feels like tap dancing in a minefield.

So, let's begin.

My sissy seeds were sown in my life in a moment of time that I can clearly remember to this day. I was likely "20-21" and still was spending a good deal of time on all fours as opposed to fully upright. The evening that started it all was a social gathering in our home, with neighbour couples all over for dinner, drinks and a lovely evening. I remember it was desert and coffee time with the Ladies all still seated around the dinner table chatting, while the rest were in the rec room. 

I was a curious type, both then and now and amidst all the Female conversation, gossip, and conversation, I found myself on all fours underneath the table as a rambunctious one. I remember vividly seeing 5 sets of pantyhose clad legs surrounding me, and my curiosity drew me to reach out and touch one of those silky pantyhose clad legs. I still remember how smooth it was, and I also instantly remember the neighbour Lady squeal a little by surprise, which cause me to laugh uncontrollably! Suddenly a game was born, and I was all in to play!

Leg after leg I would gently touch, giggling out loud, and soon all the Women at the table were laughing in amusement at my harmless silly antics. I had no possible way of knowing what that position beneath a group of Women, innocently fetishizing Feminine silkiness, and being laughed at by the entire group of Women for my efforts, would one day lead to. In that moment, I was giggling uncontrollably and having an absolute delight of a time!

Everything that I would become later in life was emblazoned on my soul and galvanized into that experience. The sissy seeds were sown into my most vivid early memory. It would take another decade for those seeds to start to germinate, but I can look back fondly and remember exactly where it all began for me. It was if I was destined to be a submissive sissy, seeking Women's approval, and finding joy in their amusement of me. 

I had no possible way of knowing what was to come, and how much it would change my life, but I know where it began.