The Joy of Women Knowing

Originally posted Oct 2, 2015

 

 I envy those gurls who can let it all loose and with a simple click expose themselves fully across the electronic globe and into the world. It's a tempting thing to just drop the cloak that covers, hides, protects, shelters, entraps one and stand alone, in your heels and makeup, ready to take on the brave new world as one's true self; the one you've nurtured inside and alone for years.

For every brave one, there are thousands who can never overcome the shackles of their born gender that bind them. It's fully understandable and all one can hope is each gurl finds her way as safely as possible and in a fulfilling manner.

There are many still who live in and out of the shadows, taking brave steps into the light only when they feel safe, with those who they have found to feel safe with. I, myself are one of these type gurls. Once I was fully in the shadows, all by myself. But once I found Femdomination, I found the ability to step out into the dim light provided by Mistress Morganna, and then Lady Diva and eventually others.

 

Finding the key to unlock your inner Feminine self is a monumental moment. It's a door that you can never go back through, although sometimes we think we can, but really we can't. So many purge their gurly things only to collect more after the guilt has worn off. I've always considered myself so fortunate to have found Women to shelter, encourage, and guide me in so much that i have never purged. I'm not saying I haven't pruned my wardrobe over the years, because I have, but I have always found Dommes able to take those Feminine clothes and aid other gurls. No, I couldn't just one day lie to myself and say " I'm no longer doing this anymore", simply because I know how ridiculous that is to even think.

My path was set the moment I as a teen, grabbed my sister-in-law, Anna's panties off the guestroom floor and inhaled the Womanly essence that instantly penetrated my psyche to unlock the memories of fascination I had years earlier with Women's stockings. My life was created for me to eventually become a sissy. There was no escaping it, but the choice I did have was to determine what type I could be. My devotion to Women as a sissy gurl put me on a quest to find and embrace Women who were willing to accept me for the incomplete being I was, with so far to go and so much to learn. That was several years ago, before the LGBT+ movement.

 

Coming out as a blurred gender person today, while still not easy by any means, is far more doable today than when I first started. For me the fear of complete ridicule, and life altering damage was very real. Even with all the gender bending going on today, still most Women have a difficult time understanding what sissies are all about, let alone the different types of sissies! The reason for this is that a majority of sissies prostrate themselves with desires to be subservient to maleness, which to me (sorry gurls) is absolutely skin crawling to think of. Therefore most Women tend to think of sissies as some sort of gay freaks when that's not always the case.

For me, I love Women and everything about them to the point of devoting such a great deal of my adult life in emulating, and being subservient to them. I understand the initial shock a Woman would have to see a sissy dolled up before Her and the humiliating laughter that would come from Her or a group of Ladies together. That is a badge of honour I'm willing to earn, if to one day have Lady Diva or another Domme be able to explain to them what I'm all about and to help them understand perhaps a little of what gurls like me are all about. We're not something to be feared, but rather nurtured like any childlike person learning their way in the world, who needs that Motherly love only Women can provide.

 

With every step along the way, I've tried to seek out Women who could understand me and in turn for my respect, devotion and servitude, enable me to become the gurl I continue to desire to be. The beautiful thing about the journey is that it never ends and it always is evolving. At first it was Mistress Morganna knowing my embryonic secrets of once being a panty boi and later a beginning sissy wannabe. Then as She brought Lady Diva into my life, my evolution started and my desire to share my most locked away and private secrets with other Women began to grow, albeit slowly and carefully. Lady Bernadett, Mistress Patricia, and Suzanna Stern then became key holders to my most trusted secrets and over time I learned the proper ways to approach and offer respect and genuine humility to those Women who were my superior in the hopes that I could learn from them. Not all accepted me but over time my sincere desires to engage with Women in a mannerly and respectful way as a gurl brought me Womanly gifts beyond belief.

 

With my cherished circle of Wonderful Dommes now reaching to many parts of the globe, it gives me growing confidence to perhaps one day drop the veils and come fully out. I can't say how close or far that is, because I've never truly know where my sissy life was going to take me. However each time I share intimate parts of my life and sexuality with Lady Diva, Maîtresse Cathie La Divine, Cruel Dama, Lady Jane and others it helps me grow in confidence. Recently I shared a video with Lady Diva of a recent Shemale encounter where I was sissied up and took a wet Shecock facial and as W/we watched it together. 

Instead of being overcome with dread or embarrassment, I was filled with pride that I could show Her what Her sissy She-cocksucking slut creation had become and the smile on Her face at the end was something that filled me with pure joy. It's my continuing dream to make Her smile along with all the other Amazing Dommes in my life, via my development as a true sissy, to always be their devotee and their plaything to make them happy.

In the end, it's always been what I've ever wanted , and the more Women who can come to know the real me, the happier I will become. I'm a gurl, I love Women, I serve Women, I'm a whore for Shecock, and I'm a Shecock cumslut, and I will always be inferior and incomplete without You in my life.

With Love to All Womanhood

Your Sissy

Devina