The Great Divide Closes a Lot

 

 One thing I have learned from creating this blog (now a second time) is how I have evolved along the way and how certain parts of me have changed, grown, and in some case fallen by the wayside. The onset of my journey at the feet of Mistress Morganna, led to the development of my Female spirit, and subjected my then still growing male ego, to ongoing acts of repression, and severe modification, all under a Dominant Female agenda. To me it's been a fascinating look back at the entire process. I love who Devina has become, and I couldn't imagine life without being her. Yet even more fascinating has been the divide that seemingly has always existed between her and the remnants of my male ego, more specifically focused on Shemale interaction.

 

Devina was allowed to grow and flourish as a gurl, with all the gurly things she desired, yet when the urge took hold to give in to the lure of Shemale cock, it was something for my male ego to experience, not Devina. The Great Divide as I call it. It's not that Devina didn't want to experience what it would be like to make love with a Shemale, my gawd it remains one of my deepest desires! However looking back, I think it may have been a way to keep my male ego in check, by reducing him to a shemale cocksucker, and cementing his place in the basement of the psyche pecking order. By further emasculating my male ego, Devina would always be a more evolved part of my personality, and would be safe from guilt, and shame. 

Devina's place was to serve her Mistresses, and to better herself as a Feminine creature as best she could. The male ego could have the experience of sucking shemale cock, along with any confusion or negative fallout from being subject to serving real cock.

 

Devina would have her day, but only when the divide would be crossed, and the male ego had been permanently put in it's place, and the only way to do that would be to give in to Shemale cock when the urge was too great, only to have that cock serve it's real purpose of permanent submission to a Femdom agenda. Once forever collared and chained, that remaining part of my psyche could be used and manipulated by Devina for her benefit, not it's, and that's why more Shemale cock had to be sucked, and ultimately the remaining male ego would have to give in to the ultimate submission: to be taken and fucked by Shemale cock. The male ego didn't know yet, but it would submit harder and deeper than it ever feared, in the form of a Shemale Mistress....

 

Mistress Z was a Shemale Domme who had captured my interest upon discovering Her via the wonders of the world wide web. Upon a holiday trip to Her city, I booked an appointment for a session, and once again it felt like the first time with Mistress Morganna all over again. I was no stranger to being with Shemales, but this was different. This would be the first time I blended BDSM and Shemales and that signified a reduction in the great divide between the two halves of my psyche and it was a noticeable shock to the system as I had worked diligently to separate the male ego and life from Devina's life, and now that were being mixed.

I was let into Her suite and after a pleasant introduction and discussion as to what my reasons for seeing Her and what my interests were. I was ordered into a room and told to undress and remain on all fours until She returned. As always, I did as instructed, sneaking a peak at the bondage bench in the room with me, along with assorted toys, and instruments of the trade, so to speak. Soon the door opened and in walked Mistress Z, clad in a leather dress and long black stockings with 5 inch heels. I was collared and crawled over to the bondage bench as ordered where our session began.

Being a first time experience between us both, there was a bit of a disconnect, certainly compared against the growing bonds I had with Mistress Morganna and Lady Diva, where I felt part of a growing connection to a Sisterhood as Devina. Here I was back to subjecting my male ego to good old fashioned discipline and punishment and Mistress Z certainly enjoyed that. It didn't take long for Her to comment, " You've done this more than once, haven't you?"

"Yes Mistress Z, I have been a submissive for some time"

" Good....but never with a Mistress like me, correct?"

I knew exactly whet she meant by the words "like me..." and the anxiety of the unknown was intense as I replied " That is correct Mistress Z"

"Good, I like breaking in first timers.. " She purred and proceeded to blindfold me.

 

Still paddling me, I could feel Her move to the front of the bench where She got close, pulled up her leather dress a bit and then I felt it. Her cock behind her panties pressed up against my lips....

" Kiss it slave!"

I eagerly did as instructed and kissed it over and over as She slowly moved it from side to side, each time making me find it blindfolded. 

" Mmmm.. you like that, do you slave?"

"Yes Mistress Z, I love it."

She smacked my behind hard and laughed, "You hungry cocksucker! I'll make sure you get your fill.."

She proceeded to torment me and tease me all over with Her toys and ran Her fingernails all over my lashed body as She circled, each time stopping by my face to kiss Her cock which was growing more each time, straining the fabric of Her panties. Finally she uncoiled her 8 inches of Shemale Domination and let it smack my face over and over as I puckered my lips to kiss it each time she let her snake strike. 

 

Blindfolded and anticipating a glorious cocksucking session, She suddenly stopped and went behind me and inserted a finger into my asspusy. " I just want to know how tight or nervous you are first" as She inspected her prey. 

" Looks like we need to loosen you up a bit, because we don't want to send you home broken in half! Haha!"

Mistress Z inserted a lubed plug, just enough to open me fully, and ordered me off the bench as She released my bonds. I did as instructed, careful not to lose the plug and returned to all fours and was led out of the room and down the hallway to Her bedroom. Upon entering She led me to a place where I was told to kneel and She opened my mouth with Her She-cock as I eagerly sucked on it. It had felt like it was sooo long since I had tasted real Shemale cock, and I relished it completely. 

"Oh, very good slave, but I want you to squeeze my balls hard as you suck my cock!"

Doing as instructed I squeezed Her balls in one hand while sucking Her now fully erect 8" cock, all the time being praised as to how skilled I was. "Oh, you've done this before, haven't you?"

" Yes Mistress, many times" I gasped between long pulls.

" I think I should let you admire your work", as She removed my blindfold to reveal my beside a full length mirror on my knees with this enormous She-dick in my mouth. 

"Watch yourself suck it, slave, and suck it hard!"

 

I had sucked several shemale cocks up to that point in my life, but this was the first time my male ego got to see the actual reflection in a mirror of the cocksucker he had become. It was humiliating and exhilarating at the same time. My male ego, ashamed at what it had been reduced to, and Devina's ego, proud as hell at the skill being shown working hard on that cock. I could hear Devina's voice in my head yelling loudly,

 " Suck that cock you male faggot! Suck it good, make me proud!"

With instinct I responded, sucking Mistress Z's cock for all I was worth, which was absolutely worthless in any real Woman's eye. Mistress Z moaned loudly and would take Her cock out of my mouth to rub it all over my face, marking me with the taste of her cock and I would eagerly accept it into my mouth over and over. She eventually ordered me to Her bed and had me lay on my back as she took off Her dress and straddled my face and gave me another feeding of Shemale cock, and I hungrily accepted. It began to feel like any other experience I have ever had with a Shemale until She stopped, wiped Her She cock on my lips and told me to turn over. Suddenly I knew what would happen next, yet I still didn't know if I was ready for what was to come...

 

Up until that moment, my male ego had been a Shemale cocksucker, and an eager accomplished one at that. However my male ego was about to go far beyond anything it had experienced before, and once the trip began, there would never be any going back. Mistress Z was about to fuck my ass with her very real, very hard Shemale Cock......

She removed my plug and reinserted a lubed finger and to Her pleasure found me better suited to her liking. " Are you ready for this?"

I simply nodded, unable to speak, fighting with all the mass of emotion, desire, confusion, and lust within. Somewhere I summoned the ability to whisper, " Please go very slow Mistress"

"Mmmmmm....ok" I could hear Her smile as She replied.

And then, after all the experience under me of being taken by Mistress Morganna's and Lady Diva's strapon cocks, I arched my back towards Mistress Z as instructed and for the first time ever, felt a real cock probe my asspussy for real...

 

The sensation of feeling a real, hot, twitching cock enter you for the first time is something I will never forget, and as Mistress Z took Her time entering me, I knew immediately why people love it so! It was soooo different from a strapon, be it rigid or flesh-like, no this was amazing! It was so warm, and wonderful, that once Mistress Z slipped past the inner muscle, I readily accepted Her all the way in until I could feel Her pelvis on my ass. I moaned loudly at being filled full of real cock for the first time, and I told Mistress Z that this was the true first time to be taken by a real cock.

She was genuine in Her response, " I am honoured at being your first!" and as She said that She twitched Her cock inside me several times which almost made my brain explode with rockets of pleasure. 

" I will make sure this is something you never forget.." and with those words She proceeded to fuck my asspussy slowly and steadily......

 

With every inch of stroke in and out of my asspussy, my body was exploding with sensations never felt, and Mistress Z would stop occasionally to twitch Her cock inside me to see me jump and moan with sensations that were outer worldly to which She would giggle out loud. She was enjoying my first ever experience in her own way just as I was.

With each full stroke, She would increase the speed and depth and angle of Her cock entering me, and I was on another planet. Inside my head I could hear Devina shouting joyously, 

" That's it! Take that cock in your ass you male faggot, work that dick bitch! Whooo Hooo! Yeah!" 

She was so happy that I had taken my first steps to bridge the Great Divide and that there would be a time when Devina was bent over as a gurl before Shemale Cock, and in the presence of Mistress Lady Diva and perhaps others, fulfilling her destiny as a true gurly slut.

For now the male ego was being fucked into complete and permanent submission to the power of Femdomination. This was my first cock, but not my last. The bridge to Devina had to be built now, there was no going back....ever....

My gratitude to Mistress Z is eternal, and losing my sissy cherry to Her real cock was an experience that changed me forever and made me a better person. Thank You!